Live in a world where there is no such thing as pain, but also no such thing as sports
where there is no such thing as world hunger, but also no such thing as food?
No food. Or hunger. I need my baseball.
Be a Siamese twin, connected by the fingertips
by the hair?
By the hair. Then you can cut it and no longer be attached. Cmon now.
Have taste buds all over your body
have a tongue that doubles as a tape measure?
Tape measure tongue.
Eat by putting food down your pants
Be stuck on a stalled bus with condescending cobblers