July 1
Break a light bulb in your mouth
or
Be slashed with a thousand paper cuts and then dipped into a giant bowl of melted butter?
Who comes up with these things… light bulb.
July 2
Be stuck on a desert island with a fishing rod
or
a funhouse mirror, a silly wig and a joke book?
Um fishing rod. Duh!
July 3/4
Be a super villain called ‘The Pharmacist’
or
‘The god of upholstrey’?
The Pharmacist.
July 5
Give an enema to an elephant
or
give an enema to george lucas.
George Lucas, I dont think he can crush me if he gets angry and sits on me like an elephant would..
July 6
Experience a brain freeze (literally)
or
heart break (literally)
ouch. ummm. brain freeze.
July 7
Remove a 30 foot tapeworm from a rhinoceros
or
be peed on by mr. snuffleupagus?
peed on. sesame street rocks.