February 4
Be able to see newly released movies in your eyelids
or
To change any person’s gender for a year?
Na na na na everyday! like my eyeballs stuck on replay-play.
February 5
Be “The Laminator”
or
“Dr Humidity”?
The Laminator!!
February 6/7
Have fish for hands
or
mops for feet
Definitely mops for feet! Do you know how much fun and how handy that would be? (or.. footy?) fish for hands wouldn’t be very useful.
February 8
Have fingernails that could grow into chewable vitamin C tablets
or
A hand with full hair straightening and crimping capabilities?
Definitely straightening and crimping capabilities. Another very handy thing.
February 9
Be able to increase the intensity/frequency of nearby throbbing objects
or
to flatulate to the tune of “when the saints go marching in”
uhhhhhhh i dont think im going to go there.
February 10
Have a magic mirror that possesses woody allen’s personality/sense of humor
or
a coffee table that possesses the personality of donald rumsfeld?
magic mirror. def.