December 23
Fight gladiatorial-style to the death with (insert friend)
be surgically connected at the hip with (insert enemy)

fight a friend.

December 24
Melon-ball your left eye out
Cheese-grate the skin off your left forearm?

ick. ick. ick.

Decmeber 25/26
Have a personal caddy that will carry anything you have anywhere you go
a minstrel who will record the events of your life in song?


December 27
Wear an obscenely revealing thong to the beach
be the subject of a loud ‘happy birthday’ song at a very busy restaurant?

Happy Birthday

December 28

Gyrate crazily in front of your best friend’s parents for a full two minutes
punch your grandmother lightly in the adam’s apple?


December 29
Tongue-clean a urinal puck
drink the entire contents of a boxer’s post fight spit bucket.

This is another one of those ones I can’t even think about or I’ll get sick

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