December 9
Kick your aunt in the stomach
or
drop 200 turtles off a 40-story building
Drop turtles.
December 10
Be NBA commissioner and institute a two-second shot clock
or
a three-feet-tall maximum height rule?
shot clock
December 11/12
Grow up in the wild
or
in a burger king?
Burger King
December 13
Live in a world where all international disputes were settled by means of break dancing contests
or
kick ball games
Break dancing contests
December 14
Spend your honeymoon in a home depot
or
a bowling alley?
bowling alley
December 15
Marry a bipolar tour guide
or
autistic foot locker salesperson?
tour guide.