June 3
Have complete control over every headline of the biggest daily newspaper
or
who marries whom?

Newspaper headlines.

June 4
Have toast with Napoleon
or
Play scrabble with Moses?

Scrabble w/ Moses.

June 5/6
Date a half woman half horse
or
half woman half couch.

Way to assume I’m a dude, calendar.

June 7
Sit next to webster at a dinner party
or
king tut?

WEBSTER!

June 8
Punch your grandmother, not full force, but solidly in the back of the neck for $16,500?
or
Spend two weeks wearing nothing but a g-string for $2,000

Considering I have no grandmother, I’ll have to go with the g-string.

June 9
Have your uvula (the thing that hangs down in the back of your throat) caught by a fish hook and reeled in
or
take a professional hockey play’s slap shot to the teeth at 10 feet?

Ick. Neither again LOL far too painful.

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